Being a Kiwi is about driving in a German car to an Irish pub for a Belgian
beer, then travelling home, grabbing an Indian curry or
a Turkish kebab on the way, to sit on Swedish furniture and watch
American shows on a Japanese TV.
Only in N.Z. ... can a pizza get to your house faster than an
Only in N.Z. ... do supermarkets make sick people walk all the
way to the back of the shop to get their cough, cold, aspirin
while healthy people can buy cigarettes at the front.
Only in N.Z. ... do people order double cheeseburgers, large
fries and a DIET coke.
Only in N.Z. ... do banks leave both
doors open and chain the pens to the counters.
Only in N.Z. ... do we leave cars worth thousands of dollars on
the drive and & lock our junk and cheap lawn mower in the garage.
Only in N.Z. ... do we use answering machines to screen calls and
then have call waiting so we won't miss a call from someone we
didn't want to talk to in the first place.
Only in N.Z. ... are there disabled parking places in front of a
NOT TO MENTION...
3 Kiwis are injured each year testing if a 9v battery works on
58 Kiwis are injured each year by using sharp knives instead of
31 Kiwis are injured each year by watering their Christmas tree
while the fairy lights were plugged in.
8 Kiwis had burns trying on a new jumper with a lit cigarette in
A massive 543 Kiwis were admitted to emergency in the last two
opening bottles of beer with their teeth.
In 2005 eight Kiwis cracked their skull whilst throwing up in the toilet