Sex on Mars (18+)

07.03.06, 23:40
The year is 2222 and after accumulating enough frequent flier miles,
Mike and Maureen land on Mars. They meet a Martian couple and are
talking about all sorts of things.

Mike asks if Mars has a stock market, if they have laptop computers,
how they make money, etc.

Finally, Maureen brings up the subject of sex.
"Just how do you guys do it?" asks Maureen.
"Pretty much the way you do," responds the Martian.
Discussion ensues and finally the couples decide to swap partners for
the night and experience one another. Maureen and the male Martian go
off to a bedroom where the Martian strips. He's got only a teeny, weenie
member - about half an inch long and just a quarter inch thick.
"I don't think this is going to work," says Maureen. "Why?" he asks,
"What's the matter? "Well," she replies, "It's just not long enough to
reach me!"
"No problem," he says, and proceeds to slap his forehead with his
palm. With each slap of his forehead, his member grows until it's
quite impressively long.

"Well," she says, "That's quite impressive, but it looks like a long
pencil, it's still pretty narrow..."

"No problem," he says, and starts pulling his ears. With each pull,
his member grows wider and wider until the entire measurement is
extremely exciting to the woman.

"Wow!" she exclaims, as they fall into bed and make mad, passionate love.
The next day the couples rejoin their normal partners and go their
separate ways. As they walk along, Mike asks, "Well, was it any good?"

"I hate to say it," says Maureen, "but it was damn good. How about you?"
"It was horrible, replies. "All I got was a headache. She kept
slapping my forehead and pulling my ears."


    • usenetposts Re: Sex on Mars (18+) 08.03.06, 09:08
      Another Mars sex joke goes like this:

      Harry and Helen, an earthling couple, both chavs, are walking in the New
      Forest, when all of a sudden a spaceship lands, and to their amazement, this
      little bald guy, green as a lizard, steps out and walks boldly up to them
      sticks out a long bony finger and points it at helen's tummy, and goes

      Beedee beedee beedee beep!

      "Oy" says Harry "Leave my bird alone, or I'll give you a swift kick in the
      balls"

      "We..on..Mars..do.. not..have..balls..like..you..earthmen."

      "All right then. I'll give you a kick in the cock, then!"

      "We..on..Mars..do..not..have..cocks..either."

      "Wait a minute, how do you 'do it', then? How do you make love? Make babies?"
      asks Helen

      "I..just..showed..you - beedee beedee beedee beep!"
      • varsovian Re: Sex on Mars (18+) 08.03.06, 12:20
        I thought Kylie sex was funnier
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