mimi78
26.02.04, 11:53
Jak sobie z tym radzic? Jak to leczyc?
To jest opis mojej osoby..
Wiem ze powoduje to u mnie wiele problemow m.in to ze nie moge ulozyc stalego
zwiazku. On zawsze odchodzi.
Pomocy....
Nie znam Polskiej nazwy - ale opisy jest taki:
Codependency is a vicious form of Post Traumatic Stress Disorder
"Codependence is a very vicious and powerful form of Delayed Stress Syndrome.
The trauma of feeling like we were not safe in our own homes makes it very
difficult to feel like we are safe anywhere. Feeling like we were not lovable
to our own parents makes it very difficult to believe that anyone can Love
us.
Codependence is being at war with ourselves - which makes it impossible to
trust and Love ourselves. Codependence is denying parts of ourselves so that
we do not know who we are.
Recovery from the disease of Codependence involves stopping the war within so
that we can get in touch with our True Self, so that we can start to Love and
trust ourselves."
"The war we were born into, the battlefield each of us grew up in, was not in
some foreign country against some identified "enemy" - it was in the "homes"
which were supposed to be our safe haven with our parents whom we Loved and
trusted to take care of us. It was not for a year or two or three - it was
for sixteen or seventeen or eighteen years."
"Instead of blood and death (although some do experience blood and death
literally), what happened to us as children was spiritual death and emotional
maiming, mental torture and physical violation."
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Characteristics of Codependency
Following is a commonly used list of characteristics of codependency.
My good feelings about who I am stem from being liked by you.
My good feelings about who I am stem from receiving approval from you.
Your struggle affects my serenity. My mental attention focuses on solving
your problems/relieving your pain.
My mental attention is focused on you.
My mental attention is focused on protecting you.
My mental attention is focused on manipulating you to do it my way.
My self-esteem is bolstered by solving your problems.
My self-esteem is bolstered by relieving your pain.
My own hobbies/interests are put to one side. My time is spent sharing your
hobbies/interests.
Your clothing and personal appearance are dictated by my desires and I feel
you are a reflection of me.
Your behaviour is dictated by my desires and I feel you are a reflection of
me.
I am not aware of how I feel. I am aware of how you feel.
I am not aware of what I want - I ask what you want.
I am not aware - I assume.
The dreams I have for my future are linked to you.
My fear of rejection determines what I say or do.
My fear of your anger determines what I say or do.
I use giving as a way of feeling safe in our relationship.
My social circle diminishes as I involve myself with you.
I put my values aside in order to connect with you.
I value your opinion and way of doing things more than my own.
The quality of my life is in relation to the quality of yours.
