Dowcipy po angielsku

13.08.04, 19:21
Two men are approaching each other on a sidewalk. Both are dragging their right foot as they walk. As they meet, one man looks at the other knowingly, points at his foot and says, "Vietnam, 1969."
The other hooks his thumb behind him says, "Dog crap, 20 feet."

A komu się spodobało, zapraszam po więcej:
>>> www.anglista.org/forum/viewforum.php?f=6
    • Gość: naiwna Re: Dowcipy po angielsku IP: *.neoplus.adsl.tpnet.pl 13.08.04, 19:53
      dobre, dobre... :P
    • crazy.berserker Re: Dowcipy po angielsku 14.08.04, 12:55
      A to znacie?:
      A priest and an Australian shepherd met each other in the final of a
      quiz show. After answering all the normal questions, they were
      neck-and-neck with the same number of points and the quizmaster had to
      set a deciding question. The question was, to compose a rhyme in 5
      minutes including the word "Timbuktu". After 5 minutes, the priest
      presented hispoem:

      "I was a father all my life,

      I had no children, had no wife,

      I read the bible through and through

      on my way to Timbuktu..."

      The audience was thrilled and celebrated the churchman as the certain
      winner. However, the Aussi stepped forward and recited:

      "When Tim and I to Brisbane went,

      we met three ladies cheap to rent.

      They were three and we were two,

      so I booked one and Tim booked two..."


      • ron_obvious Dwa sportowe i jeden "japoński" 14.08.04, 14:05
        Fajny, hehe

        A ten znacie?:
        As you probably know, Japanese are crazy about politeness, so one day Mr.
        Okihara came to London. Unfortunately, a car run over him as he was crossing
        the street. Then another driver didn't see him and again run over poor Mr.
        Okihara, as he was trying to get up. When Mr. Okihara, half dead is being
        helped by a group of passers-by, one of them truly concerned about his
        condition asks him "How are you?". Mr. Okihara bleeding and hardly breathing
        answers: "I'm fine, thank you. And you?"

        A teraz 2 dowcipy footbal'owe, pierwszy zwiazany z porażką Anglików na
        ostatnich ME.

        Question: "Why are the English players considered best lovers?"
        Answer: "They stay on top for 90 minutes, but still they come socond"

        A drugi zwiazany ze słynnemi wypowiedziami Managerów i piłkarzy z Wysp:

        Three Premiership managers, and three English players were asked one
        question: "Why did the chicken cross the street?"

        Sir Alex Ferguson: "I don't know why, but he did cross the street at least 3
        minutes too early, for sure"
        Arsene Wenger: "A chicken? What chicken? I didn't see it, it was too far"
        Kevin Keegan: "I don't know, but I'd luv if he crossed it, I tell ya I'd luv it"
        David Beckham: "As the England captain I can tell you, that you know, I really
        don't know, you know, just as a captain"
        Alan Shearer: "Never say never, when chicken crosses the street it's for your
        eyes only, and you only live twice so it's like a view to a kill to see the
        chicken as chickens are forever"
        Rio Ferdinand: "ehhh, sorry, I forgot"
        • ron_obvious Re: Dwa sportowe i jeden "japoński" 14.08.04, 14:06
          zapomniałem dodać, że chodzi o porażke Anglików w meczu z Francją.
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