Korzystajac z chwilowej niedyspozycji kolegi (grypa) dorwalem sie do jego
komputera i znalazlem oprocz nieprzyzwoitych obrazkow (nagralem sobie tak na
wszelki wypadek) zbior dowcipow niepoprawnych politycznie. Na pierwszy ogien
proponuje Polish Jokes
Characteristics of Poles in jokes: Portrayed as stupid, and
sexually "desperate".
Note: Polish jokes are primarily of American origin.
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The manager of a prosperous whorehouse in Warsaw one night found, to his
dismay, that he was short of girls for the evening's entertainment. Thinking
quickly, he dashed out and bought several inflatable fuck dolls, figuring
that, given his average clientele, no one would know the difference. Soon
after, he ushered a customer into a room that housed one of the new lovelies,
assuring him that he was in for an especially good time.
When the customer came out of the room a little while later, the manager was
waiting eagerly in the hallway. He winked at the fellow and asked "Well?
How'd you like her?".
"I just don't know what happened," said the customer, shaking his head. "I
bit her on the tit, she farted, and flew out the window".
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A Polish man walks into his local pub and goes straight up to the barman, who
turns away disgusted at the handful of dog shit the Pole is holding.
"Hey, Fred" says the Pole, "Look what I almost stepped in".
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A polish man is sitting at a bar having a few drinks when he notices a very
attractive lady sit down at the other end of the bar and order a drink.
The polish guy calls the bartender over and says "whatever she is drinking
give her another one and tell her it is on me."
The bartender replies "I don't think you want to do that."
"What do you mean?" yells the polish guy, "Send her the drink!"
"O.K." the bartender replies, "but I don't think it is a good idea."
"And why not?" asks the polish guy.
The bartender leans over the bar and very softly says "because she's a
lesbian."
"I don't care, send her the drink." says the polish guy.
So after the lady gets her drink the polish guy very casually strolls down to
the other end of the bar and sits down next to her and says, "so what part of
Lesbia are you from?"
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A Pole goes into a store and asks the clerk, "I'd like some Polish Sausage."
The clerk looks at him and says, "Are you Polish?"
The Pole says, "Well, yes I am, but, if I had asked for Italian sausage would
you ask me if I was Italian??? Or if I had asked for German sausage, would
you ask me if I was German??? Or if I wanted a taco would you ask if I was
Mexican???"
The clerk says, "Well, no."
The Pole says, "WELL, why do you ask me if I'm Polish just because I ask for
Polish sausage????" The clerk
says, "Because this is a hardware store."
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Q: Why wasn't Jesus born in Poland?
A: Because God couldn't find three wise men and a virgin.
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How do you know when your house has been burgled by a Pole?
The garbage's been eaten, and the dog is pregnant.
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Two Poles and a Black were employed by the same construction company and got
into the habit of working together - until the day the Black fell from a
scaffold eleven storeys high. When the police came to check out the
situation, there wasn't too much left to identify the fellow, so the officer
in charge turned to the two distraught Poles. "Listen, guys," said the
cop, "was there anything distinctive about this man?"
"No, he was just a regular guy" said one of the Poles.
"Hey, wait a minute!" piped up the other. "He had two arseholes!"
"Are you bullshitting me?" asked the cop. "How the hell would you know?"
"Because every time we went into the pub around the corner for a beer at the
end of the day," said the Pole happily, "the barman would say, `here comes
that stupid Nigger with the two arseholes'!"
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moj ulubiony:
A young Polish girl was hitchhiking, and a big semi-trailer pulls over to
pick her up. The driver was a serious CB addict, and had an enormous CB radio
in his cabin.
"That's the best CB radio ever made", he explained to the bug-eyed girl, "you
can talk anywhere in the world with it".
"No kidding," she gasped. "Boy, I would really love to talk to my mother in
Poland".
"Oh, yeah?"
"I would give anything to talk to my mother in Poland".
"Anything?" he leered.
"Anything" she assured him.
"Well, maybe we can work something out," he panted, pulling his cock, by
which time it was fully erect, out of his pants.
So the girl reaches over, leans down, opens her mouth, and says
loudly, "HELLO, MUM?"
