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atheist joke

30.09.05, 15:25
An atheist was taking a walk through the woods.

What majestic trees!

What powerful rivers!

What beautiful animals!" he said to himself.

As he was walking alongside the river he heard a rustling in the bushes
behind him. He turned to look. He saw a 7 foot grizzly charge towards him.

He ran as fast as he could up the path. He looked over his shoulder and saw
that the bear was closing in on him. He looked over his shoulder again, and
the bear was even closer. He tripped and fell on the ground. He rolled over
to pick himself up but saw the bear right on top of him, reaching for him
with his left paw and raising his right paw to strike him.

At that instant the Atheist cried out: "Oh my God!..."

Time stopped.

The bear froze.

The forest was silent.

As a bright light shone upon the man, a voice came out of the sky: "You deny
my existence for all of these years, teach others I don't exist, and even
credit creation to a cosmic accident. Do you expect me to help you out of
this predicament? Am I to count you as a believer?"

The atheist looked directly into the light, "It would be hypocritical of me
to suddenly ask You to treat me as a Christian now, but perhaps could you
make the BEAR a Christian?"

"Very well," said the voice.

The light went out.

The sounds of the forest resumed.

And then the bear dropped his right paw, brought both paws together and
bowed his head and spoke:

"Lord, bless this food, which I am about to receive from thy bounty through
Christ our Lord, Amen."
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    • kaganowski Atheist joke czyli atheist in hell 02.10.05, 15:38
      Ateista po smieci poszedl, jak to ateista, do piekla. Diabel go najpierw
      oprowadza po sekcji dla niewierzacych: wyglada to na wysokiej (*****) klasy
      osrodek wypoczynkowy: eleganckie pokoje, baseny, restauracje i bary z darmowym
      wyzywieniem i wyszynkiem, teatry, kina, galerie sztuki, sauny, "gyms" a takze
      gratisowe call girls i bezplatne vouchery do agencji towarzyskich. Ale nagle z
      dziwnym usmieszkiem na twarzy diabel prowadzi naszego ateiste na antresole, z
      ktorej rozciaga sie rozlegly widok jak z "Piekla" Dantego: kadzie z goraca
      smola, a w niej smaza sie ksieza, zakonnice, biskupi i papieze oraz
      ajatollachowie i mullowie razem z rabinami. Niesamowite wycie obdzieranych
      zywcem ze skory i lamanych kolem oraz cwiartowanych, smrod siarki, goraco nie do
      wytrzymania. Nasz ateista mocno zbladl, nogi sie pod nim ugiely. Ale diabel go
      uspokaja: to tylko dla wierzacych: nie mozemy przeciez zawiesc ich oczekiwan...

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