treser_krow
26.03.03, 15:51
To kopia wiec nie tlumacze ja zreszta nie znam tego jezyka.
Once upon a time there was a shepherd looking after his sheep on the side of
a deserted road. Suddenly a brand new Porsche screeches to a halt. The
driver, a man dressed in an Armani suit, Cerutti shoes, Ray-Ban sunglasses,
TAG-Heuer wrist-watch, and a Pierre Cardin tie, gets out and asks the
shepherd: "If I can tell you how many sheep you have, will you give me one of
them?"
The shepherd looks at the young man, and then looks at the large flock of
grazing sheep and replies: "Okay."
The young man parks the car, connects his laptop to the mobile-fax, enters a
NASA Webster, scans the ground using his GPS, opens a database and 60 Excel
tables filled with logarithms and pivot
tables, then prints out a 150 page report on his high-tech mi! ni-printer. He
turns to the shepherd and says, "You have exactly 1,586 sheep here."
The shepherd cheers, "That's correct, you can have your sheep." The young man
makes his pick and puts it in the back of his Porsche. The shepherd looks at
him and asks: "If I guess your profession, will you return my animal to me?"
The young man answers, "Yes, why not?" The shepherd says, "You are an IT
consultant."
"How did you know?" asks the young man.
"Very simple," answers the shepherd. "First, you came here without being
called. Second, you charged me a fee to tell me something I already knew, and
third, you don't understand anything about my business... Now can I have my
dog back?"
****
A programmer was walking along the beach when he found a lamp. Upon rubbing
the lamp a genie appeared who stated "I am the most powerful genie in the
world. I can grant you any wish you want, but only one wish."
The programmer pulled out a map of the Mediterranean area and said "I'd like
there to be a just and last peace among the people in the middle east."
The genie responded, "Gee, I don't know. Those people have been fighting
since the beginning of time. I can do just about anything, but this is beyond
my limits."
The programmer then said, "Well, I am a programmer and my programs have a lot
of users. Please make all the users satisfied with my programs, and let them
ask sensible changes"
Genie: "Uh, let me see that map again."
