Can you check it for me?

[Gość: ola:-)]

hallo, I have to write a short describe of my room. I prepare it but
I don't know that all is ok? I'll be satisfited and thankful, if you
check it for me :-)I know that for check grammar and vocalubary is
forum "Only English" but there I'll wait long,sorry. And only one
request: can you write me what can I do for doesn't repeat so much
time: "there is" and "house"? I haven't any idea :-( So... (and it
should include about 200-250 words):
"I live in detached house. It's a big one with very big garden. I
have in my house five rooms but my favourite room is my bedroom.
It isn't a big one but for me it's enough. It has yellowish walls -
it's sunny yellow - and it's really bright. I haven't any
decorations and posters on the wall.
I like my bedroom because I spend there the most of my free time -so
it must be comfortable and cosy for me! I listen there music and I
relax. I do there my homeworks and learn too. I like it because of
it's simple - not too much photos and needless things. Only this,
what I really need.
In my bedroom I have bed with really colourful and nice bedding -
it's a red one. I have two bookcases and of course one bookshelf
with the most important and the most favourite books. It's above my
bed - so I hope it doesn't fall on me head during a night... Near me
windows stay me desk. I have on it a lot of my pencils, pens,
notes... For me it's very comfortable room - I feel there fantastic!
From the window I can see my garden: trees, lawn anf flowers. I see
a small bit of field and other houses - my neighbours' ones.
I can say that it's room from my dreams :-)"
Thanks ;-)

[jonathan.oakley]

Hi Ola,
I have tried to put this into your words rather than my words as I
think it should like you...I hope this is ok:
"I live in a large detached house with a sizable garden. There are
five rooms and my favourite room is my bedroom.
My room is quite small but for it is fine. I feel comfortable
sleeping there. The walls are coloured a bright yellow .I haven't
any decorations - my bedroom is quite plain.
I like my bedroom and spend most of my free time there –as it’s
comfortable and cosy for me! I often listen to music as I find it
relaxing and soothing. When I am not listening to music my room
becomes a study and I do my homework.. I like my room because it's
simple – I don’t like lots of clutter, I only have the things I need.
In my bedroom I have a bed with really colourful and nice bedding -
my cover is a red one. I have two bookcases and of course one
bookshelf
containing all my important and favourite books. It's above my
bed - so I hope it doesn't fall on my head during the night...My
desk is by the window as I prefer natural light while I study. My
desk has lots of pencils, pens,
and notes... For me it's a very comfortable room - I feel fantastic
whenever I am there.
From the window I can see my garden: trees, a green lawn with wild
flowers. I can also see some fields and neighbouring houses. I am
happy and content because I live in the room of my dreams.
Jon :)

[jacinda]

Shouldn't your teacher be checking your homework?

[Gość: ola]

dear jacinda, it's my homework to school. My teacher check it
tomorrow :-) so I want to have a perfect homework! Do you understand
me? I hope...
Thanks John ;-)

[jacinda]

Well, then your teacher should be the one checking it, not Jonathan.
now she'll think that your English is great and you don't need any
help which obviously isn't the case. She'll also think that she's a
fantastic teacher and that she had taught you well.
Also, will Jonathan be there with you during your test/exam? I don't
think so.

[jonathan.oakley]

Oh Jacinda! Give Ola a break! She's probably in a class of 20+
pupils...recieves little tuition from the teacher and has to cope
with all this in a second language!

~When people keep telling you that you can't do a thing, you kind of
like to try it~

[ola9186]

thanks Jonathan :-)