Who are you???

[Gość: Lucy]

I've been wondering for some time now , who the people writing here are. All
of them Polish? A few Americans? Any Brits? I wish you introduced yourself
with a phrase like this " Hi! I'm Polish, 29 and female". Maybe you disagree
with me, but I sometimes find it difficult to write not knowing even the sex
of the person I'm writing to. Some nicks can be very misleading.

Hi! I'm VIP and I'm THE man

[Gość: VIP-1]

[Gość: Smyk]

Hi I am British from Silesia,very old,but in full working order!Just killing
time reading all that garbage.Do you know song "Lola"by The Kinks(I'm not sure
how to spell it,seventies pop group).Try to listen to the lyrics and it will
make you laugh,promise.The very first time I heard it,I didn't know what it was,
but as my English improved(a bit)I love that song,so do not ask people,what sex
they are!I would get the CD from my car,but am too lazy to move.See ya(I am not
that old)

[waldek.usa]

Gość portalu: Lucy napisał(a):

> I've been wondering for some time now , who the people writing here are. All
> of them Polish? A few Americans? Any Brits? I wish you introduced yourself
> with a phrase like this " Hi! I'm Polish, 29 and female". Maybe you disagree
> with me, but I sometimes find it difficult to write not knowing even the sex
> of the person I'm writing to. Some nicks can be very misleading.

Hi!
I am Polish, ** and male.
Sometimes you are better off not knowing ;))
How about you - are you Lucy Liu?
'cause if you are Lucy 'he'- to tfu...
Just kidding.

[Gość: Lucy]

Now I realize I've made a mistake. I shouldn't have written anything about sex
or age, because it made me sound ridiculous. All I wanted to know is how many
native speakers enter this forum. Questions about age and sex are not that
important though it sometimes helps to discuss some issues with a person you
know more about. Anyway, let's not talk about it any longer. I can see it's no
use.

[waldek.usa]

Gość portalu: Lucy napisał(a):

> Now I realize I've made a mistake. I shouldn't have written anything about
sex
> or age, because it made me sound ridiculous.


No, it didn't make you sound that way to me :). Some people recognized it as
a "dating starter" I've seen some requests for pictures and bank statements.
I have, however, quick humor, and those two lines about Lucy came to me in an
instant. They actually rhyme - if you speak Polish. If not - here's a version
in English ( well, almost, again...)

How about you - are you Lucy Liu?
'cause if you are Lucy 'he' - than I bid you adieu...:(

I like playing with words, as you've noticed.
I am a Polish native speaker. Some time ago I had worked for the Superior Court
in Massachusetts as a translator/interpreter. It was fun, I had quite a few
interesting cases!



All I wanted to know is how many
> native speakers enter this forum. Questions about age and sex are not that
> important though it sometimes helps to discuss some issues with a person you
> know more about. Anyway, let's not talk about it any longer. I can see it's
no
> use.


"...it sometimes helps..." - yep
See ya

oh, mine!

[Gość: sleepy]

lucy, i agree with you, almost. i think the males responding on this forum
ought to include the size of their bank account, and the females their picture.











ojej-ku

;)

[glory]

He, he Waldekusa. I see we have the same taste in the movies. Lucy Liu.
What a woman. But there was one female star who was working on the same movie
set with over 500 male actors. What was her name?

[waldek.usa]

glory napisał:

> He, he Waldekusa. I see we have the same taste in the movies. Lucy Liu.
> What a woman. But there was one female star who was working on the same movie
> set with over 500 male actors. What was her name?



I'm glad you've liked my two-liner.
Some time ago I was sitting at the bar of one of my favorite restaurants,
having beers and a chat with a Chinese bird. I had mentioned Lucy and she
protested:
“…Lucy is not pretty, She has those ugly eyes…” She meant raised outside
corners.
No, she wasn’t ugly, quite the contrary, and her reaction was what I get when I
say:
“Oh, that cute Buffy” – some jealousy. Come on, give me a break.
Anyway, maybe we should take this out of Lucy’s stuff, so we don’t pollute it.
Some people will take this as a male chauvinistic piggism.

AS to your question - no I don't know her name. Who is it??

[Gość: jorgen]

Try some private forums.

[glory]

Her name was Houston. Her goal was to score 500 men and she did it.
What a restless body!

29,M,Polish

[boldhead]

[Gość: walker]

Cheers mate!

I come from south of London... I guess I am Brit, aren't I?

[waldek.usa]

Gość portalu: walker napisał(a):

> Cheers mate!
>
> I come from south of London... I guess I am Brit, aren't I?


You allright, mate

I'm from Warsaw. Check my cockney out!
Cheers!


An Irishman walks into a boozer in Dublin, right, orders free pints of Guinness
and sits in the back of the room, drinkin' a sip out of each one in turn.
Wen 'e finishes them, he comes hammer and tack to the bloody bar and orders
free more. The bartender tells 'im, "Yer know, right, a pint goes flat after I
dror it; it would taste better if yer bought one at a time." The chuffin'
Irishman replies, "Well, yer see, I 'ave two bruvvers. One is in America, the
uvver in Australia, and I'm bloody well 'ere in Dublin. Wen we all left 'ome,
we promised that we'd drink this way ter remember the bloody days wen we drank
togeffer." The bartender admitted that this is a nice custom. The Irishman
becomes a regular in the bar, and always drinks the chuffin' same way: 'e
orders free pints and drinks them in turn. One day, he comes in and orders two
pints. All the uvver regulars notice and fall silent. Wen 'e comes hammer and
tack to the bloomin' bar for the second round, the bloody bartender says, "I
don't want ter intrude on yor grief, right, but I wanted ter offer me
condolences on yor great loss." The Irishman 'ave a looks confused for a
mument, ffen it occurs ter him woss 'appenin'. "Oh, right, no," 'e says,
right, "evry geezer's not so bad. I've just quit drinkin'."

[Gość: sleepy]

waldek, i pissed my pants... that wus so bloody funny... he he he heh
he ...know any more?

[waldek.usa]

Gość portalu: sleepy napisał(a):

> waldek, i pissed my pants... that wus so bloody funny... he he he heh
> he ...know any more?
As you probably know, cockney is a dialect popular in UK. That's why I've
posted it for walker, who's a Brit, but I'm glad that you like it. How about
jive, since I'm here in US, and one more story as a bonus. Maybe I should
open "English only humor"?


An Irishman walks into some bar in Dublin, o'ders dree pints uh Guinness and
sits in de back uh de room, drinkin' some sip out uh each one in turn. 'S coo',
bro. When he finishes dem, he comes back t'de bar and o'ders dree mo'e. De
bartenda' tells him, "You's know, some pint goes flat afta' I draw it; it would
taste betta' if ya' bought one at some time." De Irishman replies, "Well, ya'
see, ah' have two broders. One be in America, de oda' in Australia, and I'm
here in Dublin. 'S coo', bro. When we all left crib, we promised dat we'd drink
dis way t'rememba' de days when we drank togeder. Ah be baaad..." De bartenda'
admitted dat dis be a supa fine custom. WORD! De Irishman becomes some regular
in de bar, and always drinks de same way, dig dis: He o'ders dree pints and
drinks dem in turn. 'S coo', bro. One day, he comes in and o'ders two pints.
All de oda' regulars notice and fall silent. Man! When he comes back t'de bar
fo' de second round, de bartenda' says, "I duzn't wanna intrude on yo' grief,
but ah' wants'ed t'offa' my condolences on yo' great loss." De Irishman looks
confused fo' some moment, den it occurs t'him whut's happenin'. "Oh, no," he
says, "everyone's fine. I've plum quit drinkin'."


Hehehehe!

Here comes another one:
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keep scrolling
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Paddy and Paddy, two Irishmen, went out one day and each bought a pig.

When they got home, Paddy turned to Paddy and said, "Paddy, me ol' mate, how we
gonna tell who owns which fookin pig?"

Paddy says "Well Paddy, I'll cut one a ta' ears off my fookin pig, and ten we
can tell 'em apart"

"Ah tat'd be grand" says Paddy.

This worked fine until a couple of weeks later when Paddy stormed into the
house.

"Paddy" he said "Your fookin pig has chewed the ear offa my fookin pig. Now we
got two fookin pigs with on one ear each. How we gonna tell who owns which
fookin pig?"

"Well Paddy" said Paddy "I'll cut ta other ear off my fookin pig. Ten we'll av
two fookin pigs and only one of them will avan ear"

"Ah tat'd be grand" says Paddy.

Again this worked fine until a couple of weeks later when Paddy again stormed
into the house.

"Paddy" he said "Your fookin pig has chewed the other ear offa my fookin pig.
Now we got two fookin pigs with no fookin ears!"

"How we gonna tell who owns which fookin pig?"

"Ah tis is serious, Paddy" said Paddy "I'll tell ya what I'll do. I'll cut ta
tail offa my fookin pig, ten we'll av two fookin pigs with no fookin ears and
only one fookin tail."

"Ah tat'd be grand" says Paddy.

Another couple of weeks went by, and you guessed it, Paddy stormed into the
house once more.

"PADDY!" shouted Paddy "YOUR FOOKIN PIG HAS CHEWED THE FOOKIN TAIL OFFA MY
FOOKIN PIG AND NOW WE GOT TOW FOOKIN PIGS WITH NO FOOKIN EARS AND NO FOOKIN
TAILS !! HOW THE FOOK ARE WE EVER GONNA FOOKIN TELL 'EM APART?!"

"Ah fook it!" says Paddy "How's about you have the black one, and I'll have the
white one."

[Gość: sleepy]

waldek asked, " Maybe I should open "English only humor"? "Ah tat'd be fookin
grand", says sleepy. "Ten we'll av two thousand fookin polish and none of them
will av fun 'cuz dey can' read."

[waldek.usa]

Gość portalu: sleepy napisał(a):

>
> waldek asked, " Maybe I should open "English only humor"? "Ah tat'd be fookin
> grand", says sleepy. "Ten we'll av two thousand fookin polish and none of
them
> will av fun 'cuz dey can' read."


Right good, right good, sleepy. I've already opened it and no bloke visited.
Maybe they don't understand English 'umor, 'oo knows, then, eh, squire? Go
there and I'll post sumfink - as yer wanted it.